Friday, April 29, 2011

So Disappointed

Emma has been struggling with fevers the last few days, and we've visited the clinic two days in a row for blood work and IV antibiotics, but this morning at the clinic her ANC was below 500 meaning she was severely neutropenic and at high risk for infection or illness and when we went home her fever returned, so we had to go to the hospital this evening and be admitted.  We don't know how long this stay will be, but she is SO SAD at the thought of missing her Bald is Beautiful event on Sunday.  She was so upset at home when she found out we had to go to the hospital that she yelled and screamed she didn't want to go and then vomitted from being so upset.

I was at a loss for words on how to console her.  I knew getting admitted meant that we were probably stuck at the hospital for 3 days at least.  I knew she had to have her port accessed for the third time in 48 hours.  I knew that we are expecting over 650 people to attend and support her with their love at her BBQ, and they would also be disappointed that she could not attend.  I knew this fever was a reason for more worry and concern.  I know I can not change any of it. 

I am sorry, this post is so's our reality right now.

I am praying for quick resolution of the fevers and I cautiously hope that there is a chance she might be able to be released by Sunday, but I doubt that will turn out to be the case.  I am praying for her spirit to be comforted in spite of this huge change of plans.  I am praying I don't fall into bitterness at the unfairness of this situation for Emma.  I am wishing things were different.

Thank you for supporting us.  Thank you for attending her event....even if the guest of honor has to see it in pictures.



  1. Oh Rebecca and Emma,
    I am so sorry that Emma is not feeling well, and that she might miss her big day on Sunday. To say that God has a plan in all of this seems like such empty words right now, especially to such a strong and vibrant young 10 year old girl who has already gone through so much, and would just like to be at this ONE amazing celebration in honor of HER. It truly does not seem fair. I am feeling your heartache. BUT... God does promise that HE is sufficient in all our needs. So He must be suffient even now as you both are so hurting. As your family is hurting. In the worst case scenario, maybe we can skype the event to you, like they do on many TV shows now. That would be a TON of fun! So Emma could be there! Please know we love you so much, and when my feeble words aren't enough, my holy and wonderful God in plenty.

  2. my heart cries out on your behalf! i pray His mercy and grace will blanket you in a miraculously tangible way as you fight to hang on in this wretched storm. The Truth is still true, even in the dark.

  3. I am so sorry to hear this news. We have been praying especially this week that Emma would be well enough to come on Sunday. We will continue to pray for that and that God's comfort will be unusually real to all of you. Ravinia reminds us every time we pray to remember "Emma cake" ;)
    We think of you always. Much love.

  4. Oh, sweet Emma! We are sooo sorry to hear about ANOTHER very big disappointment! All that Jesus keeps reminding me of as I pray for you tonight, is Psalms 46:1. If you remember, this was our memory verse at Good News Club the last time you were able to come. "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." God wants you to come to him in all of this!!! He wants to hold you and help you through! It is tempting to push Him away when life disappoints us, its our choice, but choose Jesus, sweet Emma Kait, choice to hold on tighter than ever!!! Because the TRUTH is that He Loves you more than anyone! Hebrews 13:5,6 Jesus said "I will never leave you or forsake you." and "the Lord is my helper" cry out to Him and just let him hold you. Art and I are praying for a miracle! We are also praying for your heart to remain looking to Jesus. We will be there Sunday. All Our Prayers, Kim and Art

  5. Emma... It is Ian, I am So glad you got to make it to the barbecue I'm surprised on how much people shaved their heads to prove their love for you, i really hope you feel better... - Ian


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